#9: Yes and No / ep.3
“Shandy-san. You’re lying about something, aren’t you?”
Mikoto’s mind raced, scrambling to build the logic that would corner Shandy once and for all.
She was certain Shandy would answer no to this one.
She wasn’t lying. She was telling the truth.
Which meant everything Shandy had been doing to Mikoto this whole time was—
“No. I promised you at the start, didn’t I — I wouldn’t lie. Don’t you believe my word?”
“No. I believe you. It’s just — if everything you’ve said really is true, then Shandy-san, you’ve gone and done something quite serious.”
“Ha, and what would that be?”
Running back through everything Shandy had said tonight, Mikoto’s tongue stumbled over itself as she finally forced the words out.
“…Shandy-san, you’ve just confessed your feelings to me! If I were to accept your confession, would you actually intend to date me?!”
“Huh?”
Shandy’s reply came out flat, almost dazed.
The classical piece playing over the wired radio happened, just then, to be Beethoven’s Fifth. Right on cue with that famous opening — da-da-da-DUM — Shandy’s composure burst wide open.
“…Pfft! Ha, ahahahahaha…!”
Full, unrestrained laughter. A sound utterly out of place in Antiqua’s dim hush, and even further removed from the mysterious, composed Shandy Mikoto knew.
“Ahh… kuhuhu, ahahaha…! My stomach hurts…! Haa… hehehe…”
She’d apparently hit some kind of laughing fit dead-on. That bright, unguarded, genuinely delighted face — so different from her usual poise — burned itself into Mikoto’s eyes.
—So Shandy-san can make a face like this too.
She’d finally uncovered a new side of Shandy, exactly as she’d set out to do tonight.
And yet Mikoto felt nothing but confusion. She had no idea what was so funny.
“Wh— why are you laughing? However I look at it, you just confessed your love to me! Getting kissed over and over, hearing you whisper you like me, you love me — of course I’m going to think you’re pushing for a relationship! Because you don’t lie, right?!”
“Ha, that’s true… Haa… And here I was wondering what had you so worked up all of a sudden, only for it to be that. You really are bad at this whole push-and-pull thing, aren’t you? Hehe…”
“P-push-and-pull…?”
“Phew… let me explain, hehe…”
Swallowing down the last of her laughter with a chaser, Shandy addressed Mikoto.
“It’s true, I do like you, Mikoto-san. But I never once said ‘I want to date you,’ did I?”
“Wh— huh?!”
“All I did was tell you how I feel about you. It’s entirely my own business, whether I choose to express my feelings toward someone I adore — and it’s entirely your business, whether you accept those feelings or let them pass by. Though it does seem you took it to mean I was pushing for a relationship.”
“S-so you’re saying it was my own misunderstanding?!”
As if to confirm exactly that, Shandy’s eyes shifted into a waxing crescent.
“Ha, so Mikoto-san really was thinking about dating me, then. And not as bartender and customer, the way things stand now — but as two people. As lovers.”
“Th-that’s — I mean—?!”
Only now did Mikoto finally understand. This whole thing had been her trap from the start.
Whispering I love you over and over throughout the game, Shandy had been slowly, steadily letting the poison build up in Mikoto’s heart, drop by drop.
“Now then, my turn. Let’s say, for argument’s sake, that you were right — that I really was pushing for a relationship, just as you assumed. In that case, who exactly is the one responding to my confession? Who decides whether we date — me, or you?”
“Who… that would be — me, I suppose—?!”
“Yes, exactly right. Your question, if I recall, was ‘if I said okay, would you actually intend to date me?’ The answer is yes. Which means all I need to do is this.”
As if soothing a small child, Shandy set her hand gently atop Mikoto’s head.
“A question. So then — will you date me, Mikoto-san?”
“Huh…? Wai— that’s— eeeeeeh?!”
Only now did Mikoto realize she’d dug her own grave, top to bottom.
Here was the truth of it.
Mikoto had mistaken Shandy’s confessed feelings for a proposal, and completely misread the situation — convincing herself she was being pushed into a relationship. That misunderstanding was exactly what had led her to ask, “if I said okay, would you really date me,” trying to corner Shandy with it — which turned out to be the very thing that sealed her fate.
The instant she’d done that, Shandy had already known she’d won. All she had to do was turn Mikoto’s own misunderstanding back on her — “will you date me?” — and just like that, the decision of whether to date or not was no longer Shandy’s to make. It was Mikoto’s.
What landed in Mikoto’s hands now was a question with no comfortable answer anywhere in reach.
—Date Shandy, or don’t.
“Now then, do answer me. No lying allowed in this game. Say yes, and Mikoto-san really will have me, you know?”
“I— I’m the one who has to decide…?!”
“Well, those are the rules, aren’t they? Is something about that unfair?”
“N-no, wait, hold on?! Suddenly bringing up dating like this—”
“I can’t speak for how you feel, Mikoto-san, but I’m serious. I don’t make confessions as a joke, and depending on how this goes, I’d be more than happy for it to turn into something real.”
“N-no, come on, you’re just toying with my feelings! That’s not fair at all!”
“But that’s what push-and-pull is. And if we’re talking about fairness, you dug straight into my heart too, didn’t you? That was a bitter Yes and No, wasn’t it?”
“That’s…”
“Now then, time for the verdict. Yes or no — no, wait.”
Shandy’s amber eyes went round.
“Will you date me? Or won’t you?”
“Uuuh, uwaaaaaaaaaah…!”
The real reason for Mikoto’s defeat lay in her own personality.
Mikoto liked to think of herself as a worldly, composed adult. In truth, she was only ever acting the part of one. And Shandy’s eyes — sharpened by however many nights running Antiqua — were never going to miss a subtlety like that.
Which was exactly why Shandy had chosen to dangle the idea of dating and then simply ask, “will you date me?” She’d been certain this would leave Mikoto speechless, without fail.
Because the truth of Kurosu Mikoto’s real nature was this: a spineless coward who liked to act tougher than she really was.
“Ha, too baaad. That’s my win.”
Defeated, with her own character and thought process read like an open book.
Everything had gone exactly as Shandy predicted.
“Ahh, that was fun. Wasn’t it, Mikoto-san?”
“It was not fun…”
“But you did learn a great deal about me, didn’t you? That I think of you as someone special. That I’d even be willing to date you.”
“I lost far too much in the process! I wanted to seem like a composed adult in front of you, Shandy-san…!”
“I like both versions of you just fine, you know?”
Having her own words — the ones she’d once said to Shandy — handed right back to her, Mikoto wanted to die of embarrassment on the spot.
Ever since the very first day she’d walked into Antiqua, Shandy had already seen straight through her — straight to the real self Mikoto had been trying so hard to keep hidden.
She’d set out to expose Shandy’s mystery, and ended up exposed herself instead.
This was exactly what people meant by the exorcist getting possessed.
“Now then, time for the promised reward. Whatever I say, look me in the eye and answer yes — or rather, ‘hai.’ Can you do that?”
“…Hai.”
Resigned, Mikoto lifted her face and met those amber eyes with a defeated stare.
The instant she did, the full moon shifted into a waxing crescent. It was the face of a mischievous girl plotting something wicked — but there was nothing left Mikoto could do about it now.
“I’d like a good look at that cute face of yours, so I’ll turn the lights on, shall I?”
“No, wait, that’s—!”
“Oh? But Mikoto-san can only say ‘hai,’ can’t she?”
“…Hai.”
“Won’t you show me your face?”
“Haaaaiii!”
Antiqua’s darkness was swept away by the warm glow of the indirect lighting.
Mikoto didn’t need a mirror to know exactly what her face looked like right now. More than the shock of losing, all she could think about was her own answer to that confession.
Her head felt hazy. Her racing pulse had settled, but a heavy, drained feeling weighed down her whole body. And her face, her ears, her hands — everywhere was burning hot.
It was all the alcohol, she told herself. Just the alcohol, making her face this flushed.
Being toyed with, stared at, teased by Shandy — she desperately told herself none of it was embarrassing at all.
“You’re beautiful, Mikoto-san. That’s a face you only show to me, isn’t it?”
“…Hai.”
“Which means you like me, don’t you?”
“……………..”
“Mikoto-san?”
“…Hai.”
“Look me in the eye and answer, won’t you?”
“Hai.”
“You like me, don’t you?”
“………..h— hai.”
Having her hidden true feelings dragged out into the open left her barely able to form words at all.
And even though this “hai” was only being forced out of her, Mikoto’s embarrassment swelled to an unbearable pitch regardless.
“That whole ‘good at push-and-pull’ thing was actually a lie, wasn’t it?”
“…Hai.”
“You’re reeeally a coward, aren’t you?”
“Hai…”
“Did you put up a tough front because you wanted me to like you?”
“……………Hai…”
“Having your heart stripped bare like this is embarrassing, isn’t it?”
“H— hai…”
“Do you feel pathetic right now?”
“…………….Hai.”
“But you don’t want me to stop, do you?”
“……………………..Hai.”
Staring at Shandy under the room’s orange glow, it felt as if even Mikoto’s own true feelings were slowly being rewritten, one “hai” at a time.
Bit by bit, she felt herself being pulled in by those amber eyes. It was almost hypnotic.
Every time she answered “hai” to one of Shandy’s questions, something in Mikoto’s endlessly indecisive heart kept settling further into place.
If only she could belong to her — how happy would that make her?
“Do you like it when I torment you?”
“…Hai.”
“You really are a pervert, aren’t you, Mikoto-san?”
“…………………….”
“No? That’s not true, is it? Of course it isn’t.”
“……………………Hai…”
“Ha. Very good.”
With that, Shandy pressed a kiss to Mikoto’s forehead. The kissed spot burned, and her consciousness drifted further away. If only she could just faint right here and be done with it — but Mikoto’s eyes stayed locked on Shandy, unable to look away.
No — it wasn’t that she couldn’t look away.
She was drawn to her. Beautiful, mischievous, and unmistakably sadistic all at once.
“Sorry. You were just too cute, and I couldn’t help wanting to tease you a little. You won’t end up hating me for it, will you?”
“…Hai.”
Shandy gave a rueful smile.
That faintly shadowed smile of hers burned itself into Mikoto’s eyes.
“Will you come back tomorrow, too?”
“Hai.”
“And the day after, and the day after that — for as long as I keep Antiqua running, will you keep coming back?”
“Hai.”
“Even knowing the real me, will you still like me?”
“……………Hai.”
“Really? Will you put my mind at ease?”
“…Hai.”
“I love you, Mikoto-san.”
“……………Hai.”
“Then, will you—”
Shandy trailed off. Then, with a small shake of her head, she said, “No.”
“Never mind that last one. That’s not something I want to make you say — it’s something I want you to say on your own.”
“…Hai.”
“All right, well done, that’s enough for tonight!”
Clapping her hands together, Shandy reached out and stroked Mikoto’s head.
That “well done,” offered like a reward for a good child — even though what Mikoto actually wanted was to be seen as a composed adult — somehow, inexplicably, felt pleasant all the same.
But all at once, every last bit of strength drained from her body, and Mikoto slumped face-down onto the counter. The hands of the wristwatch in her line of sight read past one in the morning.
Naturally, there was no last train left to catch. Tonight, too, it seemed, would be a stay-at-Antiqua-till-morning kind of night.
“…There’s no beating you, Shandy-san.”
“You can’t beat me now. But someday, I hope you will — once you’re able to answer, clearly, with a yes or a no, the question you couldn’t answer tonight.”
“Hai…”
“All right, the ‘hai’ hour is officially over now, hehe…”
Shandy laughed, gentle and warm.