Episode 34: Santa’s Been Caught

We laid out the Christmas dinner we’d prepared together on the dining table and sat facing each other.

Yui-san had done most of the prep work yesterday, so I hadn’t really done much, but cooking side by side in the kitchen had still been enjoyable.

“Kanata, the paella turned out absolutely delicious.”

“Really? I’m so glad…”

Even though Yui-san had guided me through the steps, it was my first time cooking since cookery class, so I’d been a bit worried. Hearing her say that made me feel relieved.

Seeing Yui-san eating with a beaming smile made my own cheeks relax.

I want to become a proper cook myself.

　When I can do it on my own someday, I want to make it for Yui-san. Just like she always does for me.

Christmas is lovely, isn’t it? I never knew it was an event that could make me feel this happy.

I’ve always spent it with my family before, but this is a different kind of happiness.

I realised Christmas is something you spend with someone.

“…Yui, didn’t you ever feel lonely spending Christmas alone every year?”

“Eh? Hmm. I wonder. I never felt lonely, actually. I’d just got so used to being alone, I suppose I’d become numb to it.”

She must have had invitations galore, more than stars in the sky.

Yui draws a clear line with her playmates, establishing a boundary beyond which she won’t let them cross.

　Considering not a single word of resentment ever came from the girls, they must accept it and still choose to spend time with Yui-san.

Don’t they ever want it? A daily life spent with Yui-san. The right to share trivial conversations, laugh together, and fall asleep in each other’s arms.

I want it. Maybe that’s incredibly greedy of me.

“Kanata, last Christmas…”

　She stopped abruptly at that point. She seemed to think for a moment, then shook her head from side to side.

“…Sorry, never mind. It’s nothing.”

“What was it? You stopped mid-sentence.”

“It’s fine. It wasn’t something you needed to hear.”

She said it with a sigh, so I somehow understood what Yui-san had been about to ask.

“Was it… about who I spent last Christmas with?”

I couldn’t help but ask again, and those dark eyes narrowed slightly. It felt like pressure to keep quiet, but the hint of jealousy made me feel a little pleased.
But Yui-san’s guess was wrong.

“I was spending time with my family. By then, I’d already been dumped.”

When I said that, Yui-san looked relieved, yet still a bit unconvinced.

“I see… But no matter how many times I hear it, I genuinely can’t understand. With such a lovely girlfriend, how could he cheat?”

Why, indeed. My thoughts drifted to the man who dumped me. In hindsight, it was for the best he did. Considering it led me to meet Yui-san, I can see that being with him wasn’t entirely wasted.

“It just means he didn’t truly care for me.”

That’s what I believe now. Ultimately, I think he would have settled for anyone who could satisfy his desires.

He said, “If you love me, you should be able to fulfil my needs.” Even when it caused me pain, he always prioritised his own desires. He never cared about me.

But Yui-san told me, “If you truly love each other, you shouldn’t have to force yourself to conform.”

　Those words saved my heart.

You could dismiss it as gender differences and leave it at that, and of course I know not all men are like that.

But now, it doesn’t matter at all. I don’t feel a single shred of emotion towards him.

“…If it were me, I’d never cheat, though…”

Yui-san muttered that, so I couldn’t help but lift my gaze and meet her eyes.

　I wanted to know her true meaning. Peering into those dark eyes, like the sea I adored that night.

Then, for a moment, Yui-san looked startled. As if she’d spilled words she hadn’t intended to say.

“…Even though you have no intention of getting a girlfriend?”

Saying it accusingly, Yui-san gave a forced, bitter smile as if to cover it up.

“…Just hypothetically speaking.”

She gulped from her champagne glass, her pale throat moving. The usual sparkle was missing from her décolletage, leaving me feeling strangely unsettled.

I’d thought she’d say something to me, that she’d try to seduce me. But… perhaps it wasn’t that simple after all.

After enjoying dinner, we ate Christmas cake, leaning close together as we talked about all sorts of things.

Stories from childhood, family tales, friends’ stories, and all sorts of other things. I wanted her to know everything about me, and I wanted to know everything about her.

What circumstances she’d lived through, how she’d felt at the time, how she’d arrived at this point, and how she wanted to live from now on. I wanted to know it all.

Yui-san is like a complex puzzle.

Bit by bit, gathering the pieces that spill out during conversation and fitting them together, her outline finally begins to emerge.

　But the puzzle that makes her up still shows no sign of being complete, and I still don’t know what’s depicted there.

But if I could learn each and every piece that shapes Yui-san, perhaps I could become someone who can stand by your pain and suffering, even just a little.

That’s why, after all, I truly wish to win a place beside Yui-san, even if it takes time.

　And then, before I knew it, the clock was about to strike midnight. It was time for us to head to our respective rooms.

I had decided to place the Christmas present I’d prepared quietly by her pillow after she’d fallen asleep.

Truthfully, I wanted to give it to her right now and see her happy face, but I’d save that for the next morning’s delight.

“Thank you for today. I had a wonderful time.”

“I should be thanking you. I’ll treasure it, Yui-san’s necklace.”

When I said this, placing my hand over my heart, Yui-san smiled happily and drew me closer.

“…Goodnight, Kanata.”

Her face drew near, and knowing she was about to kiss me, I gently closed my eyes. Her lips touched mine softly.

　A goodnight kiss was a first for me. I found myself thinking I rather liked this kind of gentle kiss too. A warmth spread deep within my chest, and a feeling of tenderness overflowed.

I didn’t want to part. I wanted to stay with her longer. I almost felt like being selfish.

But if Yui-san didn’t fall asleep, I wouldn’t be able to give her the present.

“…Good night.”

I gently let go of her hand.

　Despite nearly succumbing to sleepiness countless times, I managed to hold on, hold on, until the clock’s hands passed two in the morning.

Assuming Yui-san would be asleep at this hour, I slipped out of the room without slippers, tiptoeing carefully to avoid making a sound.

I couldn’t quite manage dressing up as Father Christmas like Yui-san’s father did.

I opened the door to Yui’s room slowly, trying not to make a sound. The room was pitch black, not a sound to be heard.

I crept towards the bedside, trying not to make a sound with my footsteps, and peered in gently. Her steady breathing and long lashes lowered in sleep brought me relief.

　Good, she’s properly asleep.

I must place it and retreat before Yui-san wakes.
Exercising the utmost caution, I placed the present by her pillow, trying to make as little noise as possible.

Right, mission accomplished. Now I just need to retreat without making a sound.

It was the very moment I turned to leave. Suddenly, my hand was grabbed with a sharp tug, my heart clenching.

“Waaah!”

Yui-san sat bolt upright, yanking my hand hard. I lost my balance and took a full dive onto the bed.

She wrapped her arms tightly around me, and Yui-san’s sweet, soft, just-woken voice whispered in my ear.

“…Caught Santa.”

“G-goodness, you startled me…! Honestly, Yui-san! Why did you wake up…?”

I wish she’d pretended not to notice. She’s so mean. I stayed up waiting until two o’clock just for this.

I heard her giggling softly by my ear.

“Well, I didn’t think Father Christmas would actually come, so I was just so happy…”

Yui-san’s hair tickled my neck as she rubbed herself against it. Operation failed. My shoulders slumped in disappointment.

“Oh, come on… That tickles…”

“Hey, what did he give me, Father Christmas? Can I open it?”

　A gentle kiss on my cheek made my body go limp. Yui-san hugged me tightly; perhaps because she’d just woken, her body felt slightly warm and it felt lovely.

“No. Open it in the morning.”

“Eh? Why?”

“Because that’s how presents from Father Christmas work.”

You go to sleep excited, wake up the next morning, and check your present first thing. A happy day begins right from the morning. That’s what Christmas is.

　Sneaking up in the middle of the night to check presents and then going back to sleep is against the rules.

After I explained this, Yui-san smiled, hugged me, and then flopped down onto the bed beside me.

“Alright. So, we’ll open the presents tomorrow morning then.”

Held in her arms, Yui-san pulled the duvet up completely, covering me right up to my shoulders.

“Um… Yui-san?”

This bed smells absolutely lovely. It’s Yui-san’s scent. Somehow it makes my heart race.

“…Since we’re here, let’s just sleep together like this.”

Our bodies pressed tightly together felt so good. I couldn’t bring myself to leave this bed and go back to my own room either.

Perhaps because she’d been asleep just moments before, Yui-san soon began breathing softly in her sleep.

Drawn in, I too started to drift off, feeling drowsy.

“…Yui… I love you…”

I hugged her tightly and closed my eyes. Before I knew it, I too had fallen into a deep sleep.

　The next morning, snow that had fallen all night lay piled up outside the window, turning everything white.

Seeing Yui-san, who had woken earlier than me for once, open the present in the early morning light, hugging the scarf happily and smiling innocently, I…

Ah, I thought from the bottom of my heart, how happy I am.