Episode 45: Were you actually jealous back then too?

The next morning. As I headed towards the living room, the empty cans were indeed lying on the table just as I remembered, and the lighting remote Yui-san had flung was firmly lodged beneath the sofa.

It made me realise that incident had definitely not been a dream. A mere few cans of canned chu-hai seemed far too weak to wash away that embarrassing memory.

　Soft morning sunlight filtered through the lace curtains into the living room.

My clothes, flung haphazardly all over the sofa, looked so vividly real that for a while, I couldn’t bring myself to look at Yui-san’s face.

It had been a month already since that unforgettable birthday.

　I threaded the earrings Yui-san had given me on my birthday through my piercing holes, which had finally settled. After that, my first port of call was the hospital to get my ears pierced.

I hadn’t known it would take so long before I could wear fashion earrings. I genuinely regretted not getting them pierced much earlier.

Looking at my reflection in the mirror, I felt somehow a little more grown-up.

　The lovely earrings, designed like a white clover edged in gold.

On my birthday night, after enjoying dinner at the hotel, I was naturally led to the suite. Inside the box she handed me that night…

I knew at first glance they were very expensive. But more than that, the design captivated me. So incredibly cute. It felt like being shot straight through the heart. It was almost love at first sight.

　So the month after my birthday felt incredibly, incredibly long.

Every day, opening the box of earrings Yui-san had given me and gazing at them became a habit. I was waiting impatiently for the day I could wear them.

I remember Yui-san holding my hand and smiling gently at me.

I thought this love was a quagmire.

Certainly, if you just laid out the facts, nothing about our situation had changed from before. We still weren’t lovers, and this relationship still had no name.

Yet, I felt certain something had changed since that night.

It’s strange. Just because we’d been intimate, I felt like our hearts had connected too. Was that just me being giddy?

After tidying myself up, I headed to the living room. Yui-san was reading on the sofa.

“Hey, Yui-san, look, look!”

Peering over the backrest at Yui-san. When I called out to her, she immediately placed a bookmark in her book and looked up. She tucked her hair behind her ear so I could see her piercing, tilting her face.

“What do you think? Do they suit me?”

“Ah, you can wear them from today? They’re lovely. Just as I thought, they suit you perfectly.”

　Saying that, Yui-san smiled happily. Drawn in by that smile, I smiled too. Gently, her hand reached out and touched my ear, playing with it softly, tickling me.

“Does it hurt anymore?”

Shaking my head, no, Yui-san laughed and beckoned me over. She moved around to the sofa and settled down beside me.

　Even after we became intimate, Yui-san remained exactly the same.
She was always just as kind, truly unchanged.
The guys I’d dated before would suddenly become arrogant the moment we got physical… But in a way, I felt a little relieved that she wasn’t playing games.

“You’re so adorable, I don’t want to let you leave the house anymore~…”

Staring intently at me with my new piercing, Yui-san sighed deeply.

　Tonight, I’ve been invited to a faculty social with Ritsu-san and Yuri. It’s my first proper ‘drinking party’ since I started drinking. Half nervous, half excited.

As for Yui-san, she couldn’t make it because it clashed with her regular dinner gathering.

“…Don’t drink too much, okay? I’m really worried about you, Kanata. You’re so easily persuaded.”

　Ever since I decided to go to the drinking party, Yui-san has been like this. Of course, I’m happy she’s worried about me.

But, over the past month since my birthday, Yui-san and I have been practising getting used to alcohol, sipping drinks together in the evenings. So I think I’ll be fine, I won’t make a fool of myself.

“I’ll be fine. Ritsu-san and Yuri will be there too…”

“But there’ll be loads of other people there, won’t there? If anyone tries to chat you up, you absolutely mustn’t go off with them, alright? And you absolutely mustn’t exchange contact details either. The world’s full of bad people, you know.”

Yui-san furrowed her brow tightly and said this with such obvious displeasure that I couldn’t help but laugh.

“You were one of those ‘bad people’ yourself until recently, so what gives you the right to say that?”

That’s not something Yui-san, the playgirl who’s brought home countless girls after drinking parties, should be saying. When I pointed that out, Yui-san scowled and suddenly wrapped one arm around my waist, pulling me close.

“W-whoa!”

The suddenness threw me off balance. Then she bit lightly on my collarbone, making me jerk back in surprise. I felt a strong determination not to let me escape from the arm around my waist.

　Where her lips pressed against my skin, she sucked hard, causing that familiar, slight stinging pain I’d felt before.

“H-hold on, Yui…!”

I placed my hands on her shoulders and pushed back with all my strength. She let go of me almost too easily. When she lifted her face, she smiled contentedly, as if her purpose had been fulfilled.

“Honestly, why did you have to do that in such a visible spot…!”

　It’s not that I dislike getting kiss marks. If they’re hidden by clothes, I don’t mind her doing as she pleases – it’s not like I’m showing them off.
But I do object to them being placed where people are likely to see them. The worst part is she puts them right on the borderline of being barely concealed by clothing.
It’s embarrassing if someone spots and points them out, and frankly, there’s no way to explain something like this.

“To keep the pesky insects away, insect repellent.”

Saying that, Yui-san gently pressed that wrist against my neck. Sweet, the scent of Yui-san’s perfume.

Ah, come to think of it, something like this happened before, I recall. I’m sure it was when I went to the zoo with Hayakawa-kun to see the pandas. She put perfume on me like this before we went out.

　Back then, I hadn’t a clue what Yui-san was thinking. But now, I think I understand a little. So that’s it. Back then too, Yui-san was…

“Could it be… back then too, you were actually jealous?”

“Eh?”

Yui-san’s eyes widened in surprise. She looked completely baffled, not understanding what I was talking about, and I couldn’t help but laugh at how funny it was.

“Heh heh, never mind if you don’t remember.”

“Kanata, what are you talking about?”

“Nothing at all. It’s just… Yui-san, you never said it out loud, but looking back, it really showed in your attitude, didn’t it? That’s all.”

“Eh…?”

Seeing Yui-san tilt her head, clearly not recognising what I meant, I glanced at her and stood up, thinking it was about time. Somehow, it felt like our positions had reversed.

Until now, I’d just silently watch Yui-san go out drinking, but now it’s different. Being twenty really is something, isn’t it? It feels like I’ve suddenly grown up.

“…Really, take care, alright?”

“Yes. You take care too, Yui-san. Right then, I’m off.”

Yui-san saw me to the front door and kissed me goodbye, so I left the house feeling rather light-headed.

　Feeling the slightly chilly evening breeze, I gently stroked the earring at my temple. Starting with the necklace, like this, one by one, the marks of her presence on my body were increasing. It made me feel incredibly happy and cherished.

　University life is long. Even if I can’t be Yui-san’s lover yet, someday I’ll make her say she wants me to be. The distance between us must surely be closing steadily.

As I grow older, year by year, like this, the things I can do increase one by one. I too will become an adult, and someday, I hope to graduate from being someone who only receives.

I thought I might be able to become a support for you, who finds it hard to be dependent.