Episode 70: Conversation (1)

‘What are you doing this Golden Week?’

I was studying at Endo-san’s house when she suddenly asked me that.

‘Studying for my entrance exams, I suppose. Also, Mayo-nee’s coming back, so she said we should go out somewhere. Apparently, Hikari-san’s coming too.’

As soon as I said that, Endo-san leaned in and kissed me. I feel like this sort of thing has happened more often since we started Year 3.
　Well, it’s true we did agree at the end of our second year that it was okay to do this sort of thing, but I can’t help thinking the frequency is a bit much.

After all, at this rate…

I’d better not think too deeply about it.

It’s not that I don’t like doing it with Endo-san.
If anything, I find myself thinking it feels rather nice.

Sometimes I’m even a bit exasperated with myself for feeling that way.

　Endo-san gently strokes my cheek.

‘That tickles.’
‘Takizawa’s cheeks are so soft, I just want to touch them.’
‘Do you like kissing and touching people’s bodies, Endo?’
‘I like doing it with Takizawa.’
‘Oh.’
‘You asked, but you don’t seem the least bit interested.’

I suppose I might not be all that interested.
Endo-san’s expression turned serious, and she began speaking again.

‘I’d like you to tutor me on any days you’re free during Golden Week. I might not have much time because of club activities, though.’
‘Sure.’
‘Takizawa, which university are you going to?’
‘Do I really need to tell you that, Endo-san?’
‘You don’t have to, but please tell me.’

Endo-san has been quite pushy of late.
It’s better than her hiding her feelings and just grinning, but it’s a bit of a bother when she’s too selfish.

“Sometime soon.”

It’s not that I wouldn’t tell Endo-san, but there are still many things I haven’t told my parents yet, and so many uncertainties, so I don’t feel like saying anything right now.
I want to bring this conversation to a close, so I pretend to concentrate on my studies.

There’s something that’s been worrying me a bit lately.
I heard this from Mai, but it seems Endo-san is putting a lot of effort into her club activities. I heard she’s doing extra practice until the very last minute before the school closes at night.

　Perhaps she’s fired up because it’s her last match as a third-year.

Even though she must be busy, she’s definitely not trying to cut back on the frequency of our study sessions.

And, whether it’s because of her busy schedule or because she’s worrying about something I said, I can’t tell, but Endo-san has lost weight, enough for even me to notice.

‘I didn’t really mean it when I said you were heavy. I’ve never actually felt that you were heavy, and if you were, I wouldn’t be able to carry you that far.’

　I felt sorry if she’d been worrying about it because of me and had gone on a diet.

‘You were actually worried about that? You’re so kind, Takizawa. It’s fine, I’ve just lost some excess fat from training.’

She gave a little smile.
That’s the face Endo-san makes when she’s forcing herself a bit.

‘That’s the face you make when you’re forcing yourself a bit.’

I gently tugged at Endo-san’s cheek.

“—Right then, let me rest my head on your lap for a bit.”

She really is so spoilt.
I wonder why she’s become such a spoilt brat.

“No way.”
“Well then, if we make it to the prefectural championships at the High School Sports Festival, tell me which university you want to go to. And come and watch the match.”
“Why should I?”
“I’m asking because I want you to. By the way, our school’s record of making it to the prefectural championships is practically non-existent, so I reckon it’s quite a tall order.”
“Fine, then.”
“Saying ‘fine’ just because it’s difficult, you really are a bit of a tease, aren’t you, Takizawa?”
“Say what you like.”

　Saying that, I went back to my studies.
　I want to go and watch Endo’s match, and I want her to achieve solid results in the club activity she’s putting her heart and soul into.

　No matter how much time passes, I just can’t bring myself to be honest.
　I thought I’d changed quite a bit since my second year, but I’m disheartened to realise that people don’t change that easily.

‘Don’t push yourself too hard.’
Those words were the best I could do to support her right now.

“I know, thanks for worrying about me.”
she said that and gently took my hand.

I wish she’d stop doing things like that.

I don’t like it when Endo acts as if she cares about me.

I don’t want to be treated like that.

If she’s going to leave me anyway, I don’t need it.

I shook off Endo’s hand.

Then I could hear Endo grumbling ‘boo-boo’ beside me, but I decided to ignore her.

　＊＊＊

During Golden Week, my older sister and Hikari-san came back. Apparently, they’d told my parents in advance this time, so Hikari-san was staying at my house quite openly.

“Hello there, Hoshizora-chan, have you been keeping well?”

Hikari-san spoke to me in that sort of high-spirited tone. She was as cheerful and noisy as ever, but that’s what makes her so lovely, so I somehow found myself feeling reassured by it.

‘I’ve been fine.’
‘Aren’t you being a bit cold?’
‘I’m not being cold.’

However, it’s an undeniable fact that the thought of another rowdy few days ahead gives me a headache. When my sister, Hikari-san and I gathered in my sister’s room, Mayo-nee began speaking with a serious expression.

‘Hoshizora, I’m sorry to spring this on you straight away, but we need to talk about what’s going to happen next. If we talk here, our parents might overhear, so I’d like to discuss it at Hina-chan’s house. What do you think?’

　Come on, Endo-san’s house isn’t our meeting room, you know. Just as I thought that, I checked my phone and saw a message from Endo-san saying, ‘Come over soon!’

It seemed Mayo-nee had contacted her directly.
She’s such a grating older sister, always so perfectly prepared.
More than anything, when on earth did she swap contact details with Endo-san? I felt a bit annoyed at my sister for going and swapping details with her without asking.

　Ignoring my feelings, Mayo-nee pressed on with the conversation.

“I’ve told Hikari about the situation at home, but I don’t want Hina-chan to hear about it, so I’d like the three of us to stay in the same room tonight. Is that alright?”
“I told Endo-san about myself.”
“…What?”
“I mean, about how things aren’t going well with my parents, and what I’m planning to do going forward.”
“You told her yourself, Hoshizora?”
“Who else would have told her?”

Mayo-nee looked completely taken aback.
She probably never imagined I’d tell anyone about this situation. I myself hadn’t thought I’d tell anyone either.
You never know what life has in store.

“Well, that makes things easier then. Shall we ask Hina-chan to listen too?”

And so, the three of us decided to head over to Endo-san’s house.