Episode Eighty: You’re Unusually Assertive Today
We settled onto stools side by side at the dimly lit bar counter, lit by warm orange indirect lighting. Easy background music drifted through the space. Not too crowded — the kind of place that felt built for savoring a slow drink.
I dropped my eyes to the drink menu held out in front of me.
“Kanata, what do you want?”
“Um… do you have a recommendation?”
First time I’d ever been to a proper bar. Scanning the list of drink names on the menu, I had no idea what any of it even meant. Helpless, I asked, and Yui-san smiled at me, gentle.
“Unusual, not going for a lemon sour today.”
“Since we’re here… I want to try something different.”
“Something sweet? Something crisp?”
“As long as it’s not bitter, either’s fine.”
Yui-san leaned in beside me to look over the drink menu too. At that closer distance, my heart naturally picked up its pace, quick.
Thinking about what would happen once we got back to the tent left me a little tense. It’s fine, my plan should be flawless.
I swallowed down the anxious feeling threatening to rise.
First, drink some alcohol, ease this nervous tension. Can’t afford to fail, so I need to relax as much as possible.
“…Then, how about a Darjeeling Cooler?”
“Darjeeling? A tea-based cocktail?”
“Yeah. If you can’t manage it, I’ll drink it for you.”
I hadn’t known that — cocktails made with tea actually existed. When I nodded, Yui-san set the menu back and ordered the “Darjeeling Cooler” along with a “Salty Dog” for herself.
Ah, that name — I’d heard it before. A grapefruit cocktail, I think. She’d mentioned drinking it often at bars back in college.
“Never imagined I’d get to drink with you like this someday, Kanata. Best birthday celebration ever.”
Elbow propped on the counter, Yui-san turned to face me and smiled. Just seeing that smile was enough to make me happy too.
Once we got back to the tent after this, I planned to give her the present. She’d definitely be happy. Just picturing her face the moment I handed it over was enough to bring a smile to mine, unbidden.
“You’re already twenty-six now, Yui-san. Feels like it happened in a blink.”
“It really does. Lately I keep thinking how fast time actually moves.”
We first met the year Yui-san turned twenty-one. Five years had passed since then.
I hope, from the bottom of my heart, that we’ll get to spend a life together happy enough to laugh off those lost four years entirely.
Listening to the bartender shake my drink with a rhythmic rattle, I found myself reflecting, quietly — maybe I really had grown up, at least a little, since back then.
Back in college, cooking and housework had been almost entirely Yui-san’s job. But since I started living alone, I’ve gradually, clumsily started handling more of it myself.
Going forward, once we’re living together again, I want us to support each other, not just have me leaning on her — so even the things I’m not good at, I want to keep working to improve, keep challenging myself.
Which is exactly why — even at night. I don’t want it to always be her doing everything for me. I want to, too…
While I was lost in that thought, the bartender set the finished cocktail down in front of me across the counter. Looked like… iced tea, almost.
A beat later, Yui-san received her drink too. So that’s a Salty Dog. At a glance it looked like plain grapefruit juice, but, just as she’d said, salt lined the rim of the glass.
“Cheers, Kanata.”
Yui-san smiled and held her glass out to me, and I clinked mine gently against it, careful not to make too loud a sound.
“Wow, it really does smell like Darjeeling.”
Bringing it to my lips, I caught the familiar scent of black tea and, surprised, took another sip. Crisp, refreshing on the tongue, and immediately, delicious.
“You okay? Not too much for you?”
“It’s really delicious.”
Not even particularly thirsty, but it tasted so good I kept drinking, one gulp after another. Might even like this more than lemon sour.
Watching me, Yui-san laughed, “don’t drink too much, now.”
＊＊＊
My head felt hazy, floaty, like I was up above the clouds somewhere. My whole body warm, hot.
I’d really wanted to enjoy more, but partway through, Yui-san had confiscated my drink — “that’s enough” — and now, walking the road back to the tent, hand in hand, taking in the night air, slow.
“Kanata, you okay? I told you not to drink too much.”
“I’m fine, not drunk at all. Just a little floaty, that’s all.”
“Really? Your face is completely red, though.”
She said it, exasperated, but it’s fine. I’m still perfectly conscious.
“Are you worried about me? You’re so kind, Yui-san.”
Happy, I laughed, and Yui-san let out a small sigh, then smiled, resigned.
“…Well, when we’re together, drinking too much once in a while is fine. Drunk Kanata’s really cute.”
Cute, huh. Strange. Nothing’s really different from usual, is it.
Back at the tent, Yui-san switched on the lamp. The room wrapped in orange light — so romantic.
Clear skies today, so maybe we’d even see stars from bed. That’s what I’d thought — but Yui-san lowered the tent’s curtain instead.
And here I’d specifically picked this dome tent with the transparent panel section, just to see outside.
“Hey, Yui-san, why’d you lower the curtain? We won’t be able to see the stars like that.”
Sitting down on the bed with a soft thud, I said it, and Yui-san smiled, bright, and walked toward me. A warm palm pressed against my shoulder, and I blinked up at her, puzzled.
“Because I don’t want anyone else seeing you naked, Kanata.”
“Eh?”
Naked — ? Before I could even ask, the world had already spun, flipping. The bed creaked, a small groan, and Yui-san leaned over me.
“Held out until the bed, exactly as promised. You promised you’d do whatever I asked, didn’t you, Kanata? Can I do whatever I want, tonight?”
Startled by how full-throttle she’d pushed me down. Wait, hold on. I still haven’t given her the present. Scrambling to look up, those eyes, glinting like some predator, looked down at me.
That heated, desire-laden gaze sent a shiver racing down my spine.
Maybe it’s from all the nights we’ve spent together by now — my body’s started expecting pleasure from just a look alone. A fire seemed to kindle, low in my stomach, and, flustered, I pushed at her shoulder.
“Y-Yui-san, not yet… wait a second.”
“No. Can’t wait anymore.”
I’d turned my face away, but her left hand pulled it firmly back, and my lips were claimed, easy. Her thumb slipped in, and through the gap it left, her tongue pushed in, and, startled by how urgent it felt, I gripped her clothes tight.
“Mn…!”
A faint hint of grapefruit, tasted through our tangled tongues. My heartbeat, already racing from the alcohol, sped up further still. Her left hand, hitching up my skirt, gently stroked my thigh.
Never imagining she’d want me this forcefully, my head went into a full panic. What do I do, I need to resist. At this rate, I’ll get swept along entirely.
Even thinking that, some part of me, somewhere, didn’t want her to stop either. Feeling like I might give in completely if this kept going, I steeled myself and pushed at her shoulder.
Maybe noticing the resistance was stronger than usual, Yui-san pulled her body back.
Shoulders heaving, I drew in the oxygen I’d been missing, steadying my breath.
She’d stopped, but… Yui-san looked down at me, brows drawn together, displeased.
“Yui-san, n-no… I told you.”
“…Why?”
Being wanted this intensely, for the first time — I found myself regretting having made her wait so long. Sulking Yui-san is cute, but if I got swept along here, the whole plan would fall apart.
“I have your present ready, so… just wait a little longer.”
“Eh?”
Hearing that, Yui-san’s eyes went round, startled.
“A present?”
I nodded, small. Had Yui-san assumed the glamping trip itself was the whole birthday celebration?
As if that could ever be true. Laughing at her surprised face, I pushed myself upright.
“So, just wait a little bit, okay?”
“O-okay…”
Obedient, she pulled her body back, and I gripped the hand of the still-startled Yui-san and looked into those eyes.
“Could you close your eyes while I get ready?”
I said it with a small smile at how uncharacteristically meek she’d suddenly become, and Yui-san said “got it” and closed her eyes. Slipping off the bed, I pulled the box out of my Boston bag.
Watching Yui-san obediently keeping her eyes shut on the bed, exactly as I’d asked, was so unbearably cute that a laugh spilled out of me.
The floaty warmth in my chest surely isn’t just from the alcohol.
Climbing back onto the bed, I looked straight at her, eyes still closed. Such a beautiful face, really. I could watch it forever.
“Kanata, ready yet?”
“Not yet.”
Apparently losing patience, she said that, but I wanted to look at her just a little longer.
Taking both her hands, I set the box on top of them. At the same time, I gave her a light, brief kiss.
Pulling my lips away, Yui-san blinked, rapid, and dropped her gaze down. The instant she saw the box resting on her hands, her face went startled.
“…This is…”
“Yui-san, hurry, open it.”
Urged along, Yui-san slowly opened the box. A clover-motif necklace, matching my own earrings.
Reflecting the orange lighting, that black stone glittered, just like Yui-san’s own eyes.
“It matches the earrings you gave me, Yui-san.”
Saying that with a smile, Yui-san suddenly pulled my body into a tight, tight embrace.
“Kanata… thank you. I don’t know what to do, I’m so happy…”
“We finally have matching things.”
“Yeah… I’ll treasure it forever. The necklace, and you too.”
Pulling back to say that, her eyes were welling, and, just as I’d hoped, seeing how genuinely happy she was, something warm welled up deep in my chest.
Taking the necklace out of the box, I looped it around Yui-san’s neck. Just as I’d imagined, that onyx clover suited her pale chest beautifully.
“Just as I thought, it looks really good on you.”
“Fufu… thank you.”
Smiling, happy, Yui-san brought her lips close to mine. This time, I didn’t refuse, and accepted them. Kissing again and again, tilting the angle each time, my head slowly grew hazy.
The heat in my body, stoked by the alcohol, showed no sign of cooling, and with every touch, it seemed to gather, thicker, more insistent.
Her arm pulled my waist in tight. Mid-kiss, her mischievous palm traced gently over my body, and her fingers caught on my blouse buttons.
That’s when it hit me — she was trying to undress me.
Dangerous. Feeling this good, I’d nearly let myself get swept along, same as always.
Remembering myself, I pulled my lips away, and Yui-san, apparently startled by my sudden retreat, watched me carefully, gauging.
Without a moment’s hesitation, I placed a hand on her shoulder and pressed down, firm. Bracing myself, I put my full weight into it and pushed her down, then climbed onto her waist.
Looking down at her, Yui-san blinked, wide-eyed, startled.
My heart had been pounding, wild, this whole time, refusing to settle.
But I did it, good, I really did it… I actually managed to push Yui-san down. A little dicey there for a moment, but this much, at least, had gone exactly to plan.
“Yui-san…”
Saying her name, my voice came out strained with nerves, embarrassingly weak.
Yui-san, finally seeming to grasp the situation, took one deep breath, then smiled, happy, and I tilted my head.
Huh, that’s odd. Normally, the moment Yui-san pushes me down, I can’t think about anything at all — so why does she look so composed?
“…You’re unusually assertive today. I’m happy.”
Saying that, her left hand gently stroked up my thigh, straddling her waist. Startled, I caught that mischievous hand as it crept under my skirt and stopped it.
No, Yui-san, that’s not it, that’s not what I meant…
“N-no. You’re not allowed to touch me today, Yui-san.”
“Eh? What do you mean?”
Looking genuinely confused, Yui-san stared up at me. In a situation like this, could she really not understand?
Maybe… I need to actually say it, or it won’t get across. Thinking that, I looked steadily into her eyes, steeled myself, and opened my mouth.
“Yui-san, today… let me be the one.”
“……………………Huh?”
After a long pause, several seconds, Yui-san just blinked, blank — and said, only that.