Episode Thirty-One
“Hm? A date, is it?”
“Huh? You’d be better off not saying things like that.”
Early afternoon on the day of the summer festival, I threw a cold remark at Dad, sprawled shamelessly on the sofa. I never went through a proper rebellious phase, but I’d like him to remember I’m still a girl of a certain age.
“Oh, is that not a good thing to say? Stuff like this?”
“I don’t mind, personally, but if you say it to Ao she might stop talking to you.”
“…I’ll be careful.”
I glanced sideways at Dad muttering sadly to himself and headed for the sink.
Well, I suppose I can’t blame him for saying it. I never wear a short skirt outside my uniform, and I hardly ever put on a blouse this fluttery either. Years of watching me probably means he notices things like that.
My hair, my clothes — everything about me looked far more polished than usual, and yet the face looking back in the mirror seemed strangely stiff.
Running into a friend would be a hassle. It’s the shrine right by the school, so of course it’ll be packed with people I know. If I didn’t want the trouble of explaining, I could’ve just worn my usual clothes. And yet I couldn’t bring myself to leave the house looking like I always do.
What is Ao going to wear, I wonder.
She’d left the house earlier, saying she had something to do until evening, so I had no idea what she’d show up in. I should have come out of my room to see her off even mid-makeup.
I had no appetite, but I didn’t want Ao to hear my stomach growling either. I forced down a light snack and spent the rest of the time before leaving in a kind of daze.
◇
The station near school, usually flooded with students in identical uniforms, wore a completely different face today. Families, couples. Clusters of boys looking faintly forlorn, and groups of girls laughing without a care for who might be watching. Under a sky lit by the setting sun, crowds streamed toward the great torii gate.
Maybe because it’s a route I know so well, I’d managed to stay fairly calm on the train — but the moment the festival atmosphere hit me properly, the nerves surged all at once.
Because today is a date. I have no idea what Ao actually thinks about it. I came here meaning it that way. If someone asked what difference that makes, I couldn’t answer well — but today is a date. Ao’s and my first one.
There was still time before we were meant to meet, but I figured I should head over anyway. I didn’t want to leave Ao waiting in a crowd this size. Someone as eye-catching as her, left alone even for a moment, would probably get approached by strangers.
Beyond the torii gate hung a long row of red-and-white lanterns glowing faintly, and festival drums drifted in from somewhere in the distance. A little early in the year to properly call it summer, but it felt summery enough, and I liked that.
Just got to the station! Where’s Onee-chan?
Got here a bit ago, waiting by the torii.
I caught myself smiling and tried to rub it away, embarrassed. My expression had been so stiff back at the house, and it only took a single line through my phone to loosen it completely.
I exchanged a few light words with familiar faces who called out to me and kept scanning the crowd for Ao.
I wanted her to hurry. The knowing looks from friends who’d clearly sensed something, wanting to get to the food stalls soon — none of that mattered. I just wanted to see Ao. I wanted to enjoy the festival with her.
We see each other every day, and yet meeting up like this outside, for the first time, left me strangely nervous.
That denim outfit… no, not her. Ao’s hair is prettier than that. That hoodie… also not her.
If she’d just arrived at the station, she should be showing up any minute. I kept straining my eyes into the distance, impatience building, when a hand tapped my shoulder and I spun around on reflex.
“Sorry to keep you waiting, Yuna.”
Whatever words I’d been about to say disappeared somewhere.
My heart was pounding loud enough to be a nuisance. Even surrounded by so many people, it felt like everyone except the girl standing in front of me had simply vanished.
Holding a small drawstring purse in both hands, eyes narrowed in shy embarrassment — the sight of her was too dazzling to look at directly. I was probably making a strange face right now. I wanted to duck my head and hide it. And yet I wanted to keep looking at her, so I kept my face up anyway.
“Yuna?”
“A— ah, oh.”
“Hm?”
Nothing but broken fragments came out, like some malfunctioning machine. There was so much I wanted to say, and I couldn’t figure out where to even begin.
“Ah, um… I haven’t been waiting.”
“Not waiting at all.”
“Good. I couldn’t walk very fast in these. I’d love it if we could take it slow today.”
The nape of her neck, visible beneath hair gathered up into a little bun, caught my eye whether I wanted it to or not. The modest hair ornament tucked in was lovely and suited her perfectly, and yet my gaze kept getting pulled toward all the wrong places.
“R— right. Let’s take our time looking around today.”
“…Also—”
If I’d decided to say it, I should just say it properly. My heartbeat, which hadn’t settled since seeing her, was so loud I could barely hear my own voice.
“Today, Ao… I think you’re cute.”
“I’m always cute… though.”
Ao in a yukata patterned with white flowers on a deep blue ground looked more beautiful than I’d ever seen her. Cute? Beautiful? I didn’t have the composure right now to work out which was correct. I never imagined she’d actually come in a yukata. Walking around the summer festival with Ao dressed like this — the daydream I’d secretly had last year, coming here with Fuuka, had somehow become real.
“…Really? Glad I put in the effort.”
She said it and broke into an innocent smile. Faced with an expression I’d wanted to see for so long, I nearly forgot to breathe.
“You’re cute too, Yuna. Cuter than anyone here.”
“…That’s a lie. This is just something cheap.”
“You’re cute. Though I don’t really want to show you off to the guys.”
Glancing sideways at a group of boys making noise somewhere in the distance, Ao murmured it with a troubled expression. I don’t want to show this version of her to anyone else either.
“Should we get going?”
“Wait!”
I reflexively grabbed her arm as she started to turn toward the torii gate.
“Something wrong?”
“There’s… a lot of people. I don’t want to get separated.”
I took hold of her free left hand and started walking slowly. Her palm felt warmer than it had the last time we’d held hands.
“…Okay. Thanks.”
The feel of her hand squeezing back felt so good my eyes went soft on their own. I stopped caring at all what any classmate or friend might think, watching us.
Something about our relationship is going to change significantly today. Seeing Ao standing there, I knew it with certainty. Whether it changes for the better, or heads toward an ending — that much I still don’t know.