Episode 38 (Maria’s POV): A Childhood Friend’s Anxiety
Riri’s GPS has been stopped in an unfamiliar location for a long time now.
I noticed right after getting home from cram school, just before 11pm. Riri’s supposed to live above Sweet Stella, but the location showed some apartment I’d never seen before.
…Whose house is that?
Not long ago, I never would have imagined a day would come where I’d have to wonder something like that.
Riri never had any friends besides me, so the idea of her going to anyone else’s home was unthinkable.
But now, several faces come to mind.
The two from Sweet Stella. That classmate she’s apparently gotten close with lately. Without me even realizing it, Riri’s ended up with all kinds of friends besides me.
“Where are you right now?”
I started typing the message, then stopped myself. If she found out I was tracking her GPS, I got scared she might come to hate me for it.
The old Riri would have told me the situation without a second thought. But the Riri now has plenty of other friends.
What if someone told her: “A childhood friend who tracks your GPS is deranged. You should cut ties with her”?
Just imagining it made my whole body shake. I took a deep breath to calm myself, and decided to check Riri’s social media instead.
She’s been posting a selfie almost every day lately, so I need to make sure I check today’s too.
“—Eh?”
The moment I opened it, what jumped into view was a two-shot with a girl named “Sora.” Irritating, but that’s nothing new by now. Riri’s always been oddly close with her.
The problem was the caption underneath the photo.
“Sleepover at Sora-san’s today”
Something inside me made a sound like it was breaking apart.
Lately, Riri’s been close with this girl. She posts two-shots constantly, apparently goes out with her on days off too, and I’ve heard a lot of Sweet Stella’s customers root for the two of them as a pair.
“…This girl doesn’t like me, does she.”
I remember there being friction the last time I went to Sweet Stella. Since I dislike her, she must dislike me too.
What if this girl’s been whispering bad things about me to Riri?
What if this girl told Riri, “Don’t talk to Maria anymore”?
—What if this girl asked Riri, “Make me your number one”?
I’ve always loved Riri. Not just as a childhood friend, but so intensely that I want her entire life for myself.
But that’s exactly why I’d planned to take things slowly.
And now this girl, appearing out of nowhere, is trying to steal Riri’s side away from me.
“…Riri.”
I want to see her. Right now, I want to go take care of her.
But maybe someone like me isn’t needed by Riri anymore.
◆
Without sleeping a wink, I headed to school. I walked past Riri’s classroom in a way that was clearly unnatural, just to check whether she’d shown up yet.
Riri didn’t come for a long time. Five minutes before homeroom started, she finally rushed into the classroom in a panic.
“Ah, Maria.”
“…Morning, Riri.”
Noticing me, Riri smiled and waved. I made my usual smile too and waved back.
Riri’s hair smelled like a different shampoo than usual.
I could tell the moment she got close. Had someone deliberately had her use something with such a strong scent?
Her uniform blouse looked freshly ironed, sharper and crisper than usual.
I hate it. I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it.
Riri. Why? Why won’t you rely on me? Am I not good enough?
That whole excuse about not wanting to lean on me financially because I’m an important friend — isn’t that a lie?
I don’t want to doubt Riri, who I love so much, but nothing except negative feelings keep spreading through my chest.
I understand not wanting to rely on me financially, and that’s why she got the job. But watching Riri lately, I can tell that’s not the whole reason anymore.
Riri’s enjoying her part-time job at Sweet Stella. And she genuinely cares about her fellow cast members there.
A new place. New friends.
A version of “special” for Riri that I don’t know anything about.
“…Maria, are you okay?”
“Eh?”
“You look pale… is it a fever, maybe?”
Riri peered into my face, then gently pressed her forehead against mine. Cool, and it felt nice.
“Yeah, thought so. I think you should go to the nurse’s office.”
“…No.”
“Why not?”
A tear spilled from my eye without warning.
“I want to stay with you…!”
“…Eh?”
Riri tilted her head, looking genuinely puzzled, then smiled.
“Of course I’m coming with you.”
She said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world, and gripped my hand tightly.