Episode Nine: My First Love ―December 2032―

Ever since I became aware of my feelings for Hisako-san, it felt as though mysteries I hadn’t even realised I possessed were rapidly unravelling.

The reason I felt no attraction whatsoever to the male idols or actors the girls in my class fussed over. I understood that I was drawn to women rather than men, in short, that my romantic interest lay not in men, but in women.

　Yet even after realising I liked the same sex, I never met anyone I could like more than Hisako-san, let alone ever consider confessing my feelings to her.

After I graduated high school, Hisako-san began telling me about her boyfriends. Though the partners changed, her affections were always directed towards men.

I lived carrying a love that could never be fulfilled, a feeling I would never express. That’s why I’ve never experienced life with a lover. I grew into adulthood with my first love still festering inside me.

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Hisako-san gazed at me drinking my coffee with a deeply moved expression.

“When did you start being able to drink coffee, Rio? When we first met again after you started university, you still couldn’t drink it, right?”

“I think I was drinking it before I turned twenty. Seeing how deliciously you drank it made me want to learn, so I worked hard at it.”

“Eh⁉ Really⁉ Oh my, Rio, you do have your adorable moments!”

Though what I was drinking was rooibos tea, containing neither alcohol nor caffeine, Hisako-san seemed slightly high and was unusually talkative.

“I mean, I thought we’d never see each other again after graduation. I never imagined you’d start inviting me out so often. …I suppose it’s only natural for teenagers to admire the tastes and hobbies of adults close to them.”

“Well, I did take advantage of you graduating to try and be normal friends, didn’t I? When you said, ‘I thought I was a boring student and that you disliked me, so I was surprised you invited me…’ I had to laugh. ‘You’re the one who’s backwards!’”

“I’m sick of hearing that story…”

I wish she’d consider how I feel, having been teased about it for six years since graduation. Even though it’s my beloved Hisako-san’s voice, it’s so embarrassing I want to cover my ears.

“But it’s just so strange. I still find Rio this interesting now, and I adore her, don’t I? Why can’t she tell?”

“Hisako-san’s affection is hard to read. It’s impossible to tell if she’s serious or just teasing.”

“Hehe, you’ve become quite the observer, haven’t you?”

“We’ve known each other for eight years now.”

I never imagined that the moment our teacher-student relationship ended, Hisako-san would start inviting me out to play so often. It was the happiest mistake of my life.

　—So it’s alright. Even if I can’t see Hisako-san anymore, it just means I won’t have plans to go out on my days off. It just means more days where I feel lonely after crawling into bed. I’ve just been too lucky up until now.

I’m sure I can think like this thanks to “her”. …What do I feel about her? What do I want to happen between us from now on?

“Rio, is there something troubling you right now?”

“Eh…?”

I nearly spilled the coffee I was holding. As I wondered how she could tell, Hisako-san gave a soft laugh.

“I can tell. You seem to think your feelings don’t show on your face, but how long do you think we’ve known each other? Don’t underestimate Hisako-san.”

Seeing her smug expression made me chuckle, and my cheeks relaxed. We looked at each other and laughed.

“No matter how much time passes, I’ll always be a pupil in front of Hisako-san, won’t I?”

“Indeed. You’re a dear friend and a student. So, Rio. I’ll be moving away in March, and once the baby arrives, we won’t be able to meet as often. I won’t force you, but… if there’s something you want to talk about, why not say it?”

That gentle tone of voice I loved. I hesitated, unsure whether to speak or not. Talking about love with this person, my first love, had always frightened me.

　What if she sensed my feelings somehow? What if my emotions spilled out?

It was precisely because of that fear that I had always remained the listener when Hisako-san talked about her own boyfriend, and when asked about my own romantic situation, I absolutely refused to open my mouth.

But now, now, I thought, maybe I could talk.

I clenched my fist tightly. Slowly, I parted my lips.