Episode 31: A Friend’s Temptation Is Just Too Convenient!
Ever since the new term started, my heart’s felt like it’s been sitting at the bottom of cold water, all day long.
She’s completely cooled off on me.
What else am I even supposed to think.
Back to this, in the end.
Did I do something wrong.
Maybe I really never had the right to be happy, right from the star—
Right as I was sinking deeper into that bottomless swamp of thoughts, a sharp, satisfying thwack landed square on my forehead.
“Ow?!”
Rubbing the spot where I’d just gotten flicked, I look up to see Ia standing there, looking exasperated.
“Hey, still alive over there? Yotsuka-san?”
“Fweh?! Ah, o-oh… Ia, it’s you…”
I hadn’t even noticed we’d already made it out through the school gates after class.
Makina had committee cleanup duty today, so it’s just me and Ia walking home together for once.
Ia peers straight into my face and lets out a long, exasperated sigh.
“Your whole face looks like a half-dead zombie. You dieting or something?”
“I’m not. …Food just hasn’t really been going down lately.”
“Huh? What’s that about… alright, I’m feeding you meat, come tell me everything.”
“Wait, hold on, Ia, don’t just drag me—!”
◇◆◇◆◇
“Meat, you said, and you bring me… here?”
Where I got dragged to was a noisy burger place near the station.
Somewhere Makina and I had never been.
The place was packed with high schoolers, after-school crowd.
Thick with the smell of frying fries and unfiltered chatter.
Ia takes a huge bite out of her double cheeseburger, still holding it on the tray, then narrows her eyes at me over the straw of her melon soda, sizing me up.
“So? What happened. You and Makina fight or something?”
“…If it were just a fight, that’d almost be better.”
I poke at the ice in my paper cup with the tip of my straw, making it clink.
…I couldn’t tell anyone.
I was scared that if I said it out loud, our relationship would actually, genuinely fall apart.
But the person sitting across from me is Ia — the friend I trust more than anyone in the world, who’s been (unasked) watching over my love life since middle school.
“…She’s avoiding me. Makina.”
“Huh? Makina’s avoiding you?”
“Yeah. Ever since we became third-years, all of a sudden. She won’t even let me hold her hand, won’t meet my eyes…”
I trail off there, my words going vague.
But Ia doesn’t let that silence slide.
Pulling her lips off the melon soda straw, she skewers me with a sharp, teasing look.
“Hey, Yotsuka. You two have been dating for, what, half a year now? …How far have you actually gotten?”
“Huh?! H-how far, like…?!”
“Walk me through the stages. You two were already hugging casually before you even started dating, right? …What about kissing?”
“K-kissing… we’ve, um, done that. A lot.”
I go bright red, eyes darting away.
Over these past few months since we started dating, whenever we had the chance, alone in a room together — we’d kissed, again and again. Over and over.
It was never supposed to be anything special — it was supposed to just be our normal, everyday thing.
“So you’ve done that plenty. …What about after that?”
“Wha?! A-after that, what does that even mean?!”
“You know — touching each other over clothes, getting into the same bed and doing… more grown-up stuff. …Haven’t done that?”
“O-of course we haven’t?! We’re still high schoolers?! And Makina’s not the type to—”
“So even after half a year of dating, you’re still stuck at just kissing?”
“…Yeah. That’s… right.”
That landed right on the sorest spot.
With how things are right now — Makina avoiding even holding my hand — there’s no way anything past that could even be on the table.
“You don’t want to?”
“I don’t want to— that’s… not it, but…”
I drop my eyes, gripping my knees tight under the table.
“I guess we really shouldn’t have forced ourselves into being girlfriends. Should’ve just become normal sisters. I was the one who got selfish and confessed, so maybe I forced Makina into something she didn’t actually want. Maybe she’s cooled off on me. …This is all my fault, isn’t—”
“There it is.”
A cold, sharp voice cuts my words off.
I look up, and Ia’s already rewrapped her burger in its paper and set it down on the table.
Her usual easygoing face — isn’t there anymore.
“You know, Yotsuka. You’ve always been like this. Whenever something goes wrong, you make this face like it’s all your fault, like you’re the one who just has to suck it up and endure it. …I genuinely, seriously hate that about you.”
My fists, clenched on my knees, tremble faintly.
Hit right where it hurts, I can’t say anything back.
“Ia…?”
“Whatever reason Makina’s got for avoiding you? Not my problem. But look — kissing you over and over, playing girlfriend, but just leaving you anxious and hurt, dragging you into an endless loop of self-blame — doesn’t that basically disqualify her as a girlfriend? That’s not romance, that’s slow torture.”
Ia’s voice, dropped low, cuts clean through the noisy chatter of the shop.
“Someone you care about — someone you live with, no less — looking like she’s about to cry, with no idea why, and she just… runs away from her responsibility to explain? …That’s Makina being spoiled. Getting to have it both ways.”
“Th-that’s not true! Makina’s not the type to do something that unfair…! She cares about me, so whatever comes after, too, eventually—”
“If she actually cared about you, she wouldn’t let you make a face like that. …I never would. Not ever.”
Ia leans further across the table, sliding her hand forward.
Her neatly manicured fingers slip smoothly into the gaps between mine.
Squeeze — filling every gap, our fingers lock together tight.
…Lovers’ hand-hold.
I try to pull away, but Ia’s grip is shockingly strong. I can’t move at all.
“If it were me. I’d never leave you anxious, not even for a single day. Want to hold hands? I’ll hold them, any time. Want to kiss? I’ll kiss you until you’re the one crying ‘that’s enough.’”
“…! Wh-what are you even saying…”
“I’m saying I’d be way gentler with you than she is, Yotsuka… I mean it. Dead serious.”
“H-hey, Ia, let go…!”
“No. It’s her fault, your girlfriend who won’t even hold your hand.”
Ia laughs, a soft, teasing chuckle — but disturbingly beautiful, too.
Through our locked fingers across the table, I can feel her heartbeat, pounding hard.
No, wait.
This is just Ia’s usual teasing.
But then why is she holding my hand like this, so fiercely, so full of something like fondness?
Right as I try to yank my hand free by force—
Ia’s face gets even closer.
“If you want it, Yotsuka, I can give it to you.”
Ia stands up from her seat, circles around the table, and sits down right next to me instead.
The distance that had been the width of the table a second ago collapses to zero.
Suddenly, hot breath brushes directly against my ear.
“Wh-what are you even talking abou—”
Whatever teasing edge had been in her voice — it’s completely gone now.
My mind goes totally blank.
Because the person in front of me isn’t the Ia I know. She’s just — a girl.
“—Sex. I’m talking about sex.”