Episode 60: If you’re that careless, next time I really will eat you

You stand before me, gazing at me with such tenderness. That look of yours, I adore it beyond measure. It always makes my heart burn deep within.

But the moment I returned her gaze, I realised instantly this was a dream.

For the smiling you was just a little younger than now, still the same as when I first fell in love back in my school days.

In the four years before we met again, I had this dream countless times. I remember how my longing to see you surely conjured these dreams, and how I felt utterly crushed each time I awoke.

“…Yui-san.”

I call your name, savouring it.

“Yes?”

Your gentle voice returns. Those eyes gazing at me, unchanged from then to now. Just being looked at like that makes me feel like I might forget to breathe.

“Hold me tight.”

When I murmured it, she smiled happily and drew my body close.

Back in our school days, that’s how it was. Whenever I begged to be held, Yui-san would always embrace me like this.

As I pressed myself against her body, I could smell Yui-san’s scent, the one I loved so much.

Ah, I love you. I really do love you. I love you so much I can’t stand it. No matter how far apart we were, this feeling never changed.

“…Kanata, I love you so much.”

As if reading my thoughts, you held me tight and whispered sweetly.

This is a convenient dream. It only plays out this way because I want you to say it. I know that, yet I’m so happy I can’t help but squeeze you back tightly.

“…Yui-san, kiss me.”

Because it’s a dream. I can say anything freely. The Yui-san of that time would surely respond. I don’t know about the Yui-san of now.

Just as I wished, the Yui-san in my dream smiled happily and gently pressed her lips to mine.

Please don’t wake me, I prayed as I closed my eyes too.
I want to stay in this dream forever. If possible, forever. That was my wish—but.

“…Kanata, wake up. Kanata.”

“Mm, mmm…”

Still enveloped in a fluffy drowsiness, I slowly lifted my eyelids as my shoulder was shaken. I was having such a wonderful dream. Blinking repeatedly, as if rebooting my foggy head, I met the gaze of those dark eyes peering down at me from an unfamiliar ceiling.

“Hmm, what’s that…? Yui-san… ?”

Perhaps I’m still seeing the continuation of my dream. But it seems different from the dream I had just now. Before my eyes stands a slightly more mature Yui-san, different from the one in my dream.

When I called her name, she smiled softly and gently stroked my cheek.

“…Come on, wake up. We promised to go on a date, didn’t we?”

Hearing that, my consciousness shot back up instantly. Almost immediately, memories of last night flashed back.

“…Blimey!”

Startled, I bolted upright. Without thinking, I reached down to check if I was dressed, my hand going straight for my chest. Seeing me like that, Yui laughed out loud.

“Kanata, you’re overreacting. There’s no need to be so scared, I didn’t do anything. Don’t you remember last night?”

I felt my face flush so hotly it made a hissing sound.

There was no way I could have forgotten. Getting completely drunk, having Yui-san look after me, begging her to hold me – everything. I remembered every single word I’d said to Yui-san.

　But… admitting it was too embarrassing, and I found myself shaking my head from side to side.

“…I don’t remember.”

As I blurted out this desperate excuse, mischievous eyes peered down at my face.

“…Hmm?”

Feeling awkward, I looked away, and Yui-san laughed again at my reaction.

“…Well, it doesn’t matter if you don’t remember. Come on, have a bath. I’ve run the water for you.”

Yui-san seemed unusually refreshed, so she must have woken before me and already bathed.
Despite drinking so much last night, I miraculously avoided a hangover and felt perfectly fine, which was a relief.
After all, I’d been looking forward to our date too.

　Taking the offered dressing gown, I let her lead me by the hand towards the bathroom.

Sinking into the bath, I felt warmth seep slowly into my very core. The unfamiliar bathroom wasn’t as large as the one at home, but it was reasonably spacious and clean.

　Sinking into the water up to my shoulders, I let out a sigh. Every time I recalled last night’s blunder, I felt so embarrassed I could have vanished.

I was relieved Yui-san didn’t press me further when I said I didn’t remember.

I just hope she hasn’t realised I still like her…

After drying myself with a bath towel and wringing out my hair, I slipped into the fresh underwear handed to me before entering the bathroom. Apparently, she’d popped to the convenience store to buy them while I was asleep. As ever, I thought, Yui-san really is thoughtful.

Sliding my arms into the white hoodie she’d called loungewear, it was, as I’d expected, a little large. Well, with a ten-centimetre height difference, that was to be expected. This was the first time I’d worn her clothes, and I found myself vaguely thinking it felt rather like we were dating.

While my body was still warm, I scanned the dressing area, intending to dry my hair, but it wasn’t there. The hairdryer that should have been there was missing.

Could it be… This scene felt strangely familiar. Smiling faintly, I headed towards the living room, towel still draped over my shoulders.

　Opening the door and peeking out, my hunch proved right. Yui-san, holding the hairdryer, was waiting for me on the sofa.

“Come here, I’ll dry your hair.”

Drawn in by Yui-san’s beaming smile and beckoning hand, I smiled back and made my way towards the sofa.

It had been ages since she’d dried my hair like this.
　Her familiar, unhurried movements, unchanged from those days, felt nostalgic. Being like this made it feel like we’d gone back in time, and a tingling sensation stirred deep within my chest.

If only Yui still felt the same way… When next spring comes, might our relationship change in some way?

If fulfilling her promise to Father – to achieve results within three years – becomes the stepping stone to breaking off the engagement… I wish there was something I could do to help.

　I want to give this relationship a name. The love that couldn’t be four years ago. This time, I want to be your lover. Is it alright to wish for that?

Lost in these restless thoughts, I suddenly realised my hair was already dry. She switched off the hairdryer, lightly smoothed my hair into place, and then those wonderfully soothing fingers withdrew.

“Right, all done.”

The body soap, the shampoo – everything. Being enveloped in the same scent as Yui-san all over made me smile naturally, I was so happy.

“Thank you.”

“Mm.”

I don’t know how Yui-san lived while I was away. But seeing her treat me like this, so specially, I couldn’t help but wish that I was the only one she ever did this for, then and now.

Just as I turned to see her face, suddenly, I was hugged tightly from behind, my heart leaping in surprise.

“Um, Yui-san…?”

Back in school — it felt perfectly natural to be hugged like this. Now, even the slightest touch makes me tense.

Seeing me frozen, Yui-san smiled and whispered into my ear.

“Last night, drunk Kanata was utterly adorable… but do be careful with the alcohol. If you’re too careless, next time I might just eat you up for real.”

She definitely saw through my lie about “not remembering”.

Seeing me blush and look down, Yui laughed, then gently released her embrace.

“Right then, shall we have breakfast?”

　Talking like this, Yui-san was just the same as back then. Wondering if my heart could handle today’s date, I could only nod.

While I was bathing, Yui-san had apparently made salad and soup. Freshly toasted bread, soaked in plenty of butter, was laid out on the dining table. Even after eating so much last night, my stomach growled loudly again.

　When I clasped my hands together and said, “Let’s eat,” she replied, “Enjoy your meal.”

I doubt my self from just a few months ago would have believed that a day would come when mornings like this, sharing breakfast together as if it were the most natural thing in the world, would arrive.

　Yet here she was, right before me, her gentle eyes fixed on me. After watching me take a crisp bite of toast, she brought hers to her mouth a moment later.

“…Yui-san’s loungewear is a bit too big.”

Her clothes smell so lovely, I’m grateful she lent them to me. But still, the sleeves are a tad long.

“True. It’s cute in its own way though… Shall we pop out and buy some loungewear for you today too? So you can stay over whenever you like.”

Stay over whenever… What on earth does she mean by that?

She said it with her dark eyes narrowing mischievously, leaving me unsure how to respond. I fumbled for an answer, stabbing my fork into a cherry tomato on the salad instead.