Episode Nine
Beneath a sky beginning to tilt toward evening, three pairs of footsteps struck the dry road. I must have seen this view on the way here, and yet the grassland stretching out before us looks strangely bright.
Coming here, my gaze had been fixed on the ground the whole time, with no room to look around me at all.
I let my eyes drop from the wide landscape, and they stopped at Selene’s hand where it had stilled at her side, a little ahead.
A slender white hand, a delicate ring on one finger. I couldn’t look away from it.
I want to hold her hand. The feeling is welling up in me until there’s no room for anything else.
There’s no one here but Kiaran, and my mana hasn’t fully recovered. So holding hands would be fine, I think. I think that, and yet I can’t find the words to say it.
What has come over me. With the weight lifted from my shoulders, perhaps I’m a little giddy.
Reaching out, pulling back. I’ve done that enough times now. I press the hand down and distract myself by asking the first thing that comes to mind.
“Does Uno know? About Kiaran?”
“…Of course she doesn’t. I can’t exactly tell her something like this.”
Kiaran answers flatly, shifting her bound hands with obvious discomfort.
“Just so you know, Uno is a perfectly ordinary human being. If anything happens to her, I’ll be the one getting angry.”
“I see.”
I don’t know where the two of them met, or what time they’ve spent together. But from Kiaran’s voice just now, I have a feeling I understand their relationship, at least a little.
“…I know I’m in no position to be asking favours.”
Still with her gaze aimed somewhere distant, she continues.
“…Don’t tell Uno anything. I want things to stay the same as they are between us.”
There’s nothing monstrous in her voice as she says it.
“When you say it like that… I can’t exactly say no.”
“Selene, what do you think?”
I direct the question at the back walking slightly ahead of me, staff still raised toward Kiaran. The anger Selene carries toward Kiaran is almost certainly greater than mine. I’m glad she thinks so much of me, but I wish she could let herself forgive Kiaran even a little.
I know it’s a selfish and one-sided thing to want. I’m the first to know that.
I watch the silver hair stir in the breeze and wait for Selene’s answer. But no reply comes from her, and the city walls of the capital only keep drawing closer.
“Selene?”
I step past her and turn gently, and the face that meets my eyes has tears at the corners.
Why is she making that face. Something has been off about her ever since we left the old Association.
“Hey, are you listening?”
I touch her shoulder gently, and she blinks, startled, and turns those golden eyes toward me.
“Si, Sion. What’s wrong? Did something happen?”
She turns her face away as she asks it, her voice hurried.
“Um… no, sorry. It’s nothing.”
“You must be exhausted.”
I say it and go back to where I was, walking behind the two of them again.
She searched desperately through that enormous building, alone, after losing me. Probably thinking I might already be dead.
She’s still keeping her guard up around Kiaran, and I may have been thoughtless. But Kiaran is here with us now, and I can’t imagine her causing trouble at this point. So she can afford to relax a little, I think.
I furrow my brow at Selene’s state, and Kiaran opens her mouth.
“Going back to the capital is fine, but where are we going? If you’re keeping me tied up, don’t take me near the house. Uno might be there.”
Her voice sinks again as she says it.
“I don’t know where Uno lives, but all right. I don’t think we’ll go near it, but if we do, just say.”
I try to make it as gentle as I can, to keep her from worrying. No response from Selene.
“So where are we going?”
“I’ll tell you when we get there.”
“Ughhhh! You don’t have to be mysterious about it. It’s not going to be somewhere fun anyway.”
A glimpse of the bright expression I know, if not quite her full self, and the corners of my mouth loosen. There’s no need to drag the heavy air out any further.
After that we walked mostly in silence. The capital’s walls that had been distant gradually grew more distinct, and the road underfoot had changed without my noticing to something properly paved. Once through the quiet back gate, this commission would be finished.
What will change from having Kiaran examined, I don’t know. Perhaps nothing will. Even so, Verna will be lending her full support officially. That much is certain.
I feel like dancing. A feeling quite unlike me, rising up through everything.
And yet the person I most want to share it with — Selene — isn’t there. She’s right in front of me, and yet she feels as though she has gone somewhere far away.
I closed my hand around the pendant at my chest and let out a small breath.
“SIOOOOOON!!”
A few minutes after passing through the Association’s doors and calling for Rizett at the reception. Eyes from all directions pulling toward her, a familiar figure came sprinting down the corridor.
“Ugh—”
She threw herself at me with full force, and the back I’d stumbled into was caught by Selene. Pressed between Rizett and Selene, my small body nearly folded completely.
“A-are you all right… a little… crushing me…”
The arm around my neck was throttling me, and a muffled sound came out. I was glad to see Rizett with all her usual energy, but apparently my body was more worn down than I’d realised.
I tapped weakly at her arm, and Rizett pulled away with another enormous exclamation. I filled my freed throat with a long breath and steadied my breathing.
“Ahhhh! Sorry! I’ve been so, so, SO worried since yesterday… Selene, are you hurt?”
“Yes. Neither of us is hurt. Sion is just a little worn out, so be gentle with her?”
I glanced sideways, and Selene was wearing her usual smile, talking with Rizett. Since we’d entered the capital, she’d apparently returned to her White Witch self, and something in me eased.
“The Magic Association is the worst.”
Kiaran has been in a bad mood since I told her we were coming here. She’s been looking away ever since, and her voice makes no effort to hide the irritation in it.
I glance at her spitting the words out, and speak too quietly for Selene and the others to hear.
“I promise it won’t go badly for you. Trust me. I’ll explain everything properly after.”
No answer. She continues looking blankly around at the interior of the Association.
Human words aren’t exactly trustworthy. You’re just going to use me as a research subject, aren’t you.
Kiaran’s words cross my mind.
For someone in her position, being brought to a place known for its magical and mana research can’t be anything but threatening. The phrase research subject isn’t one I like either, but I can’t say it’s entirely wrong.
Verna isn’t the type to care about Kiaran’s feelings, so I’ll need to position myself as a buffer — making sure Kiaran isn’t hurt, and finding a way to bring her around to cooperating.
I was turning all of this over, fiddling with the hem of my robe, when a gentle tap on my shoulder brought me back.
“Sion, you were miles away — are you all right?”
Rizett, who had been talking with Selene, was suddenly right in front of me. I’d drifted off deeper than I realised.
I release the hem of my robe and give a small wave to Rizett’s concerned face, smiling back at her.
“I’m fine! Just thinking. Is Verna here?”
“She should be back in her room soon. I’ve checked, and we can wait inside — shall we go?”
“Actually…”
Rizett shifted her gaze gently from me to Kiaran. The easy warmth that had been in her face disappeared, replaced by something more serious.
“She’s… the…”
Watching her hesitate over the word monster, something ached in my chest. Rizett doesn’t want to accept it either. From every angle, Kiaran looks like nothing but a person.
“Yes. But it’s all right. She’s not a bad person. Let’s go to Verna’s room.”
I stroke the stiffness gently from Rizett’s shoulders, and move toward Selene, who has been staring vaguely down the corridor.
She’s usually beside me so constantly it borders on suffocating. If I come close, she turns to me before anyone else does. But the Selene right now seems to be looking at somewhere far away that isn’t the corridor ahead.
“Selene, what’s wrong? You being less lively than me is annoying, honestly.”
I say it with a teasing edge and take her hand, and she blinks wide for just a moment, then puts her usual smile back on.
“…I’m fine. Yes, I’m all right. I wonder what Verna will say — I’m looking forward to it.”
As she says it she squeezes my hand back, and smiles gently.
This isn’t the face I want to see. The only one who should be putting on a forced smile is me, the one who never knows how to deal with fans even after all this time.
I want to see the smile she showed me on the birthday. I want her to say well done, softly, just to me. That’s all. Just that.
“Sion, that’s a bit tight.”
Selene’s expression creased, and I released her hand on instinct.
“…Sorry. I think I’m still not quite back to myself.”
I mumble it with my eyes on the ground. Apparently I’m not in a normal state either.
“She should be back soon, so Rizett suggested we wait in Verna’s room. Let’s go together.”
I take Selene’s hand again, gently this time, and start walking, pulling her along. Kiaran, looking displeased, trails after us, and the four of us move down the long corridor.
Kiaran is here now, but the unease hasn’t fully left. I can’t let her become a research subject, and I still have to face Verna’s pressure.
Selene, and myself — both of those are worrying me too. But for now I decided to focus on the problem directly in front of me.