Episode Nine

In the end, I ended up giving away about half the parfait.
I like sweets as much as the next person, but around the one-third mark, my brain piped up with “That’s enough, thank you very much,” and my stomach felt a bit full too. Ultimately, I succumbed to the guilt over the calorie intake.
　Ibara, however, cheerfully polished off her half-eaten parfait, then bowed to me and Aki-san, saying, “Thank you for the meal.”
Right then.
Having had my decaf coffee, it was about time.

“The bill, please.”

“Right away, thank you for coming.”

I paid the combined total from last time and stood up.

“Thank you for the meal. It was delicious. See you again.”

“Hang on, hang on, hang on!”

Ibara grabbed my arm.

“Why are you trying to leave, sis?”

“It’s obvious, isn’t it? It’s night-time.”

“Aren’t you going to sleep with me?”

“I never said that.”

“That’s awful. Then why did you come?”

“I told you, to settle yesterday’s debt.”

“You’re just going home to sleep anyway, right? So you could sleep with me, couldn’t you?”

Ibara pursed her lower lip.

“Stay with me. I can’t sleep without you, big sister.”

Thud. It felt like my heart had been seized.
I scolded myself for nearly being swayed in an instant and wrenched my arm free from her grasp.

“This really isn’t right, you know.”

“Why?”

“Well, that’s… I mean, not like this. You should properly go to the hospital, listen to the doctor, and get better step by step.”

“I told you I’ve already done all that.”

“What if I were a bad adult?”

“We’d just sleep together.”

“That’s reckless. You could get your things stolen.”

“I don’t carry a wallet. Just my phone.”

Even just a phone could cause all sorts of trouble if stolen.
But it wasn’t just that.

“And… well, someone might touch you. While you’re asleep.”

Ibara looked up at me with half-closed, drowsy eyes.

“Sis, you want to touch me? Are you that kind of person?”

“No, that’s not it.”

It’s not that. Not at all.
That was just an example. Yet Ibara said it matter-of-factly.

“Fine. If you’ll sleep with me, you can touch me however you like.”

“Th-that’s not okay!”

“If you’ll let me sleep, you can kiss me, hug me, have sex with me – do whatever you want. While I’m asleep, you can do whatever you like with me.”

“Don’t talk nonsense.”

The moment I said that, a chill ran down my spine.
Because all emotion dropped from Ibara’s face.
The feeling that struck me then was probably fear.

“…Do you know, sis? Back in the day, there was a torture method where they’d drip water onto a person’s forehead every few minutes, so they couldn’t sleep at all. They say some people couldn’t endure it and went mad.”

Rubbing her eyes roughly with her palm, Ibara twisted one cheek upwards. It was a deliberately wicked expression.

“That’s how I feel right now.”

I was speechless.
True insomnia. The agony Ibara endured was beyond my imagination.

“Who cares about appearances? If you’ve got something to pay with – money or your body – you’d pay, wouldn’t you?”

“Ibara…”

“Honestly, it makes no sense. I’m constantly tired, but when I lie down, I just can’t sleep. All day I’m exhausted and my head throbs, then at night my mind’s wide awake. I try to sleep but can’t, and before I know it, it’s morning. There are things I want to do, things I have to do, but I have no choice but to abandon it all.”

Still covering half her face with her palm, Ibara spat out the words like a curse.
It was a face I’d never seen before. A drowsy, half-closed-eyed, loose and fluffy high school girl. An impression shattered by a voice as sharp as broken glass, filled with irritation.

Why must I alone suffer this fate?

A tear fell from her eyes, heavy with dark circles.
It felt as though her heart was being scraped away with sandpaper.

──Why must I alone suffer this fate?

Ah.
This child is being beaten by the rain now.
By a shower colder than any visible rain, a shower that might never end.

　Unconsciously, her hand reached out.
With the back of her bent fingers, she scooped up a transparent droplet.
The tear, freshly spilled, felt neither warm nor cold.

“…I’m sorry. I have to go home today.”

Ibara’s shoulders jerked, trembling as if whipped.
A dark shadow fell swiftly across her downcast, innocent face.
　It hurt as if it were my own. My chest creaked, my heart shrunk.
I didn’t like it.
I didn’t want this child to look sad. I didn’t want her to be hurt.
I wanted to wrap her in feathers, pamper her, be gentle with her.
I wanted to hold an umbrella over her, shielding her from the pouring rain.
Just as she had done for me.
So, without thinking, I blurted out.

“Would you like to stay over at my place?”

“Eh?”

Her face, which had been bowed, snapped up.
Deep within her half-closed eyes, a light flickered on.
The brightness made me feel embarrassed, and I turned my head away without meaning to.

“Just so you know, it’s a one-room apartment for a single person. The bed’s small, there’s no spare futon, and it’s quite old.”

“Is that alright?”

As if still unable to believe it, Ibara pressed closer to me.

“Really? Can I come to your place every day from now on?”

“I didn’t say that. Don’t get carried away.”

“Pfft. You’re stingy, sis.”

Ibara covered her mouth shyly with her puffed sleeves.

“…No way. You’re actually really kind-hearted.”

“Hmph.”

“You’re so nice, Shigure-san. I might just fall for you.”

Ah, my name.
──You little brat!

“Don’t tease your elders!”

“Aye.”

Kukuku, Ibara chuckled happily.
　Her tiny fingertips reached out and tugged at my sleeve. Though the pull was feeble, I felt utterly unable to shake her off.
There was no turning back now.
Oh dear, I’d become the sort of adult who brings schoolgirls home. Is that alright? No, it’s not.
But what can you do? You couldn’t possibly ignore a younger girl with a face like that.
Anyone would feel the same… surely.