Episode 132: It’s Summer! (2)

When evening came we gathered at the cottage and started preparing dinner.

“I heard you’re good at cooking, Hina — is that true?”
“I’m not sure about good, but I enjoy making things.”
“Then I want to eat Hina’s cooking!”

Since swimming had ended, Saaya had been clinging to Endo-san constantly. My chest had been tight this whole time.

“I’m happy to cook, but we’d need to go buy ingredients.”

Endo-san was starting to get ready to cook. I don’t want Saaya eating Endo-san’s cooking… — those words kept circling in my head.

“Since we’re all here, let’s make something everyone can do together.”

My heart was pounding hard enough to feel it in my throat, but it seemed better than letting Saaya eat food Endo-san had made, so I spoke up.

Saaya looked displeased. Endo-san, for some reason, was looking at me with a surprised expression.

“I’m with Hoshizora! I’m not good at cooking, so I’ll go buy ingredients!”
“I’ll go too.”

Leaving Endo-san and Saaya behind was a little nerve-wracking, but letting Mai go on her own wasn’t right either, so I went shopping with her.

“Are you having fun, Hoshizora?”

Mai asked with a slightly worried look.

Fun.

That would be the better answer right now — but looking at Mai’s face, it felt painful to lie.

“Did something happen?”
“No…”
“I see. I’m having fun getting to see you again after so long, for what it’s worth. And hey — even though we’re at different universities, we’re best friends for life, okay? So whatever happens, you can come to me.”

Mai asked gently.

Could I lean on this kindness…? I knew it was something I had to sort out myself — and yet I couldn’t hold it in.

“I caught myself thinking I didn’t like Endo-san being so close with Saaya-chan. That makes me a bad person, doesn’t it…”
“That’s completely normal though.”
“What…?”

Mai gave a big, teeth-showing grin.

“I get that unsettled feeling inside too when Miumi gets close with someone else.”
“What would you do about it?”
“I’d kiss her.”

It was Mai who was saying the embarrassing thing, and yet heat rushed to my face at those words.

“That’s something only a couple can do — something special.”
“True, but…”
“Well, Hina is Hina! She should just tell Saaya about going out with you — why hasn’t she?”

So she hadn’t told her. That made my chest squeeze too.

“Maybe she doesn’t want people to know she’s with me…”
“I think she just missed the right moment, honestly. But the best thing is probably to just ask Hina directly, don’t you think?”

Mai was right. I think Endo-san and I don’t talk things through nearly enough. In good ways and bad, we’re both too short on words. While I was squinting at that thought, Mai’s smile grew and grew.

“Ahh, I’m so happy. Getting to give love-life consultation to Hoshizora!”
“It’s not funny…”
“You’re right, sorry, sorry.”

Even while apologising she was enthusiastically slapping my back, clearly delighted.

The only thing we could all make together was curry, so we bought the ingredients and headed back.

“We’re back! Let’s all make it together!”

At Mai’s rallying cry everyone gathered in the kitchen.

Since my vegetable-chopping had improved since high school, I took charge of that. As I worked quietly, Endo-san had at some point come over near me and was grinning with delight.

“You’ve gotten really good at cutting, Takizawa.”
“Just do your job.”

I wanted to focus on the task, so I tossed out a cold reply. Endo-san drooped and went back to her preparations.

We all made the curry, ate it, and somehow got through dinner. But the cheerful group’s energy didn’t let up.

“Time for the summer classic — sparklers!”

Mai bounded outside.

We headed down to the darkened beach and lit the handheld sparklers we’d bought. They crackled with light, illuminating the darkness.

The other three were having a wonderful time with their sparklers — I alone felt like I couldn’t quite match the atmosphere. I’m still not good with people. Just having Saaya-chan added, one extra person, and I tired out several times faster than usual, unable to navigate things smoothly.

I’d enrolled in the Faculty of Education simply because I loved teaching — but I felt painfully aware that if I didn’t improve at connecting with people, becoming a teacher was a long way off.

Looking into the distance, only one person held my eyes.

Endo-san looks like she’s having fun…

The three of them were enjoying the sparkling fireworks together.

Now that I thought about it — last year Endo-san and I had watched fireworks together. That time I felt the fireworks were beautiful — and more than anything, Endo-san beside me was beautiful.

Of course her beauty was part of it, but not all of it. Looking at her, my heart rate multiplied. This was something I only felt with Endo-san. With no one else.

I think I’d been in love with Endo-san much longer than I’d realized.

My current mood would only ruin the fun of the three of them, so I settled into the shadow of some rocks where they couldn’t see me.

A little distance away, their voices reached me faintly — here the sound of the waves was louder. Right now those waves were giving me something close to peace, and I felt like I’d finally found somewhere to settle.

I’ll just wait for time to pass.

I closed my eyes and focused on the sound of the waves. A comfortable breeze blew off the night sea, and despite it being summer, it was pleasant.

Is Endo-san still enjoying the sparklers…

She’d been so happy watching fireworks last year too, so she must love them.

What else does Endo-san like, I wonder.

When we get back, I want to ask her lots of things.

Would she answer if I asked.

“Found you, Takizawa~”

A playful voice — Endo-san, more relaxed than usual — was standing in front of me, and my heart, which had been peaceful until just a moment ago, began to stir.

“Weren’t you all doing sparklers?”
“Over there is over there — it’s fun, but… I got a little tired. And I want to do sparklers with you, Takizawa.”

Endo-san handed me a sparkler and leaned into me uninvited. It was summer and should have felt stuffy — and yet her doing that made me happy.

“I’ve never done handheld sparklers before.”
“Really? Then your first sparklers are with me.”

Endo-san looked at me with such softness that just seeing her face made heat gather on mine. I was glad it was dark. I wouldn’t have wanted anyone to see my face in the light right now.

When the sparkler caught, it began to crackle quietly.

Last year Endo-san and I had watched fireworks launched into the sky — and now a small, concentrated version of that was right in front of us.

“They’re like little versions of the fireworks we watched together last year.”
“Takizawa really does remember things about us, doesn’t it…”
“There’s no way I’d forget.”
“Hehe, that makes me happy. This year they’re small, but we got to watch fireworks together again.”

Endo-san pressed herself closer. My right side where her body touched mine was warm.

“Let’s come just the two of us next year.”
“Wouldn’t you have more fun with your friends?”
“Friends are fun too — but the only person I want to watch fireworks with again next year is you, Takizawa.”

Endo-san stopped leaning on me and laughed, a little bashfully.

I need to put things into words, little by little. Looking at her smile, something pushed me toward that.

“Hey…”
“What?”
“Endo-san and I are going out, right…?”
“What’s this all of a sudden?”
“Would you mind if people around you found out?”

Endo-san’s already wide eyes went even wider. Then she broke into a soft, crinkled smile and looked at me with a warm expression.

“Actually, I thought you might not like standing out too much, so I’d been keeping quiet. I want to tell everyone I’m close with. Brag about it, even.”
“Brag?”
“Like — look what an amazing person I get to be with!”

Those words squeezed at my chest more and more. I’m not someone worth bragging about. I’m not as bright as Endo-san, I’m not good at making friends, and I’m not cute. And yet Endo-san always says the things that make me happiest.

Without our noticing, the sparklers had burned out and everything was dark.

My body moved on its own. I rose up slightly on my toes and pressed a gentle kiss to her lips. Endo-san looked mildly surprised — then tossed the spent sparkler aside and pulled me close.

“I always think you’re not fair, Takizawa.”
“Not fair?”
“Do you have any idea how close to losing my heart I am, every single time?”
“There’s no way I’d know that.”

I tried to look away — but she wouldn’t allow it. Her hand came gently to my cheek, and my lips were taken. I’d come to know naturally from the way her lips moved what to do next. When I parted my lips softly, Endo-san’s warmth traced gently through me.

A warmth only I get to feel.

More…

“Hoshizora~? Hina~?”

My body jolted at the voice and I pulled away from Endo-san immediately.

“Found you two here!”
“We were just quietly enjoying the sparklers~”

Endo-san covered for us smoothly. My heart was still beating away. We moved back to join the others and do sparklers as a group.

Endo-san was smiling as she picked up the sparkler she’d tossed aside. Then she sidled up close and murmured in my ear.

“We should have just let them see.”

She let out a little laugh, stroked my head, and smiled softly.